Asian Women, White Men

Lately, there seem to be a spurt of more Asian women dating white men. Like any interracial relationships, the “Sarong Party Girl” aka SPG seems to be a label that’s still being used today. Originating from the late 40s and early 50s, this stereotype still exists where Asian women seen dating white men are labelled to have extremely tanned skin, a false foreign accent, and is provocatively dressed.

Going out to a high end club in Asia, you would come across these girls. They’re seen hanging around the white men, flirting, partying and you would automatically label them an SPG. This has become a very derogatory and negative term. Mostly associated with these Asian women hunting specifically for rich white men to date or marry. While some of these accusations are true, there are also the minority groups of Asian women who are genuinely with the man for love, and he happens to be Caucasian.

Wikipedia has also stated that an SPG is a gold-digging, husband-stealing, Asian siren with a fake foreign accent. This is extremely offensive to someone like me. I can take the name calling if you think that it’s a label purely for Asian women with white men, but to go to the extent of calling an SPG gold-digging and husband stealing is just plain mean. I believe that these traits may fit some women, but I don’t think this is the label for an SPG.

I have my own opinions on this topic and I don’t claim to know everything. I don’t think anybody can truly explain this factually, without sounding racist or sexist or whatever. So I try to broach this topic to the best of my knowledge.

Why Asian women are attracted to white men?

Growing up in the city has exposed me to a lot of these Asian women and white men who fall under these labels. The Asian women are called “white-washed” for they’re usually only attracted to white men. Although some of them have dated Asian men before, the general difference is personality and not the size of their pockets or ahem… appendage. White men are said to have a better sense of humour and has a level of mentality that clicks better. This appeals to the more educated city women, who needs to find a partner of similar intellectual wavelength.

For the less educated or rural women, there’s a sense of unknown attraction to the foreign men. Movies and media exposed them to handsome Clark Gable, Daniel Craig, George Clooney type on screen. That is like the feeling of having a foreign encounter, which you’ve never thought possible. Additionally, majority of the white men here are on job contracts that pay them good money to be in an economically cheaper country where they can afford a much better lifestyle than their home country. This is attractive to some women to see a man with deep pockets. Some of these women are drawn to the material profits that they can get out of the relationship.

Money aside, relationship wise in a romancing situation – Asian men and white men have slight differences. What I gather is that while Asian men are a lot more creative when it comes to ideas and surprises, the white men stick to the basics of wooing the women. They don’t need romantic gestures to show their affection, just the little things everyday. They are not afraid of PDAs, kissing you in public, holding your hands, looking at you just because and saying “I love you” whenever. The little and most basics are what melt the women’s heart. An Asian man has major shows of affections, planning a surprise, buying you a thoughtful gift, thinking men. Of course, this doesn’t apply for all, there are always exceptions.

In bed, other than the size, many I’ve asked have not expressed specific differences. So, let’s just say that the size (and colour) is the only difference!!!

Why white men are attracted to Asian women?

The white men on the other hand is said to have the “yellow fever“. They’re attracted to all things Asian for the perceived exoticness and submissiveness of the Asian lady. White men who are relocated to KL for work tend to enjoy the KL life for a variety of reasons. Not only is the standard of living is better where the money works better for them here, they also like the culture of the country and the lifestyle. More often than not, if they’re here for a longer period of time, they would soon start to date local women. Possibly because there’re not many white women in KL. Once they get into the local dating scene, they immediately distinguish that the personality and characteristics of an Asian women and a white women are very different.

Asian women grew up in a family oriented culture and was nurtured and taught love and respect from a very young age. This translates to their relationship (work, family, friends, etc). Dating an Asian woman, the white man feels loved and pampered and respected. Even the city Asian women have strong moral values (although not as submissive) but conversations are equally if not more intellectual as a white woman yet they get the classic nurturing values of an Asian woman.

However, the perceived submissiveness of the Asian women could be disappointing to some men who seek just that. This also forms the birth of Mail Order Brides. In other Asian countries like Phillippines, Indonesia, Thailand and Vietnam, these outside marriages are becoming popular for financial reasons. Women want a better way of life and seek for this in a husband from a better developed country. This has translated to an SPG with the same motives. Dating a city Asian woman however, will disappoint those who have these expectations. Being an independent woman with strong girl power and strong minds, the white men has to learn that submissiveness is not in our vocabulary and old perceptions need to change.

There has been some interesting literature around the topic of Asian women and white men from the white men’s point of view:-

In conclusion, I don’t see why the society is so obsessed and opposed to Asian women with white men. This is all the same topic of interracial dating that has been a topic for many many years. Being a muhibbah (multi racial and cultural) country, we should embrace this. Let’s not forget, interracial babies are hot!!! We awe at interracial or mix celebrities and models on the cover of magazines, so why condemn their parents? Also, we’re now seeing more interracial dating around KL between Chinese, Malay and Indians. Although these couples get the occasional stares, we should start to understand that beauty and attraction goes beyond skin deep.

As mentioned earlier, I don’t consider myself an expert in this subject and am generally just intrigued by it. Let me know your thoughts on this subject and if you belong to these labels of being “white-washed” or have the “yellow fever”, do comment your views and your thoughts on this.

6 thoughts on “Asian Women, White Men

Add yours

  1. What about the relationships between White Women and Asian Men?Even though you don't see it a lot, I find those relationships much more intriguing than the usual White Men Asian Women pairing.


  2. Hi Winnie. Just came across your article here. Some how it is true. I myself is still looking for the right white man. I have dated 3 white men so far. But I have to call it quit when they refused to convert to Islam. One of them even asked me to tie the knot in Turkey, so we could go for civil marriage, which obviously I couldn’t do it here.
    I fall into white men not simply because of their deep pocket. I found that they can easily click with me and they can understand me better than Malay men.

    I even registered myself at few dating sites but the outcome is not so good. Quite difficult actually to get them nowadays haha…



  3. There are a lot of ugly people, plenty of psychopathes, but 98 % of them are not eurasians, and most of them are not white men who live with an asian woman.

    There are a lot of couples who are ugly, But the media only points ugly couple if the asian women or the white men are ugly. Whereas when the white women or the white men are both ugly, the media doesn’t point out this fact.

    Why so many people criticize asian women + white men ? I live in France, and I often see these women go with white men to have a better life : African women, Russian women, Ukrainian women, Arabian women who marry a white man when a western tourist go to their country. I think some others women in the USA choose a white man too : Latinas, Eskimos women, Australian aborigines…

    I live in France, all I know >> asian women + white men are not more numerous, not weirder than the others :
    – asian women + black men
    – asian men + white women
    – asian men + black women
    – white men + black women
    – white men + white women
    – etc…


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